11 Things to Know before you Go for Child Custody Mediation
So you have decided to go for child custody mediation. Before you take this further, it is important to know it all about the process.
Here’s what you need to know about child custody mediation:
What is Child Custody Mediation?
Mediation is when both parents, accompanied by their lawyers agree to meet a neutral third party for discussing issues related to their child’s custody. In most cases, it is crucial to keep discuss ions of the process confidential.
- Be Prepared
Being prepared for the court hearing is important. What about mediation? Did you prepare for it too? Although the mediator cannot impose a decision upon you, it certainly helps to have all information handy.
Some of the things you should consider carrying along with you include:
– A list of all issues important to you. This will help you make sure the issues are addressed well.
– Advice and plans for meeting various issues.
– Various records including report cards of child, progress and attendance records in school, a number of indicators suggesting your care and concerns towards the child.
– Reasons you should be made the primary custodian, or why joint custody is the best.
Interestingly, mediation can be significantly affordable than making your way through courts. This means both parents can hire one mediator (common attorney in most cases) than paying for each of them paying for different attorneys separately. Mediator will help parents come to an agreement which can be submitted to court for an approval.
- Parents are Seen Together
Usually a mediator will see both parents together during the process of mediation. Some exceptions may be when one of the parties alleges instances of domestic violence with the other parent. The mediator gives separate appointments under such situations.
- Mediation and Attorney
Be clear about what you want and inform about the same to your lawyer. The lawyer should not be confused about your motive. Also prepare a backup plan with your lawyer. This will help you know what to do under circumstances when the ideal scenario starts to fail.
Remember that mediation is a confidential process. Everything from what is said to what’s offered, negotiations, and discussions are treated as top secret unless the parties reach the final agreement.
- Gather Information
Strictly avoid entering child custody mediation instinctively. Any agreement you reach in the mediation can have a direct influence on child custody dispute. So make sure you gather maximum information before you attend. Incomplete or no information can force you to agree upon thing you would have not agreed if you had known the consequences.
- Listen More
You should be willing to listen to suggestions, solutions and all possible situations. The idea is to approach the entire process with open mind. A child custody dispute is aimed at creating a healthy situation for the kid.
- Compromise may be Necessary
It is important not to let issues with your spouse have a negative impact on custody mediation of your child. So make sure you leave everything at home. Simply focus on your child’s happiness. None of the personal issues should matter while going through the mediation process.
- Be Concerned about the Child
Thinking only about how you are going to win at the other parent’s expense is not the right thing to do. Your main concern is thinking about creating a situation that allows your child to win while creating a scenario you can both live with. You do not want to end up in court.
- Your Child Attending Mediation
Ask your mediator whether he/she would like to speak to the child. In some cases, the mediator may want to see the child.
- Win-Win Situation
Do not expect that mediation would make you win at your spouse’s expense. It isn’t fair to get into mediation thinking like that. Instead, you must look forward to create a situation that facilitates your child to win. This should be done in a way while creating a situation you can both happily agree to live with.